Happy Anniversary To The Best Couple In The World 


Happy Anniversary to the best couple in the world 

 

        Wife: Hello

Husband: How are you?

       Wife:  I am good. How is your day?

Husband: Good

       Wife: Today is our anniversary. Happy Anniversary. 

Husband: Happy anniversary.

         Wife: I noticed many greetings on social media wishing us a happy anniversary. I find it confusing to read comments from your close friends saying “ best couple in the world”; it sounds like a complete joke, when they know we rarely see each other. We see each other at most ten days in a year; I can’t understand their reason for making this comment, such flattery. It is confusing to me. 

Husband: Well, at least they sent their greetings.

         Wife: Their greetings are on social media, no contact by text or by email.  

Husband: Silence

        Wife: Hello

Husband: Yes

       Wife: I sometimes wonder if we are married. There is nothing more to this relationship to indicate we are married apart from a ring on my finger; the ring is another story, and our pictures are interjected  because we are rarely together to take a proper picture. I feel sad that we are not together.

  Husband: Look, I have told you over and over again that we cannot live in the same country because we are very busy and  one country  is too small for both of us. I expect you should be able to figure that out. 

       Wife: One country is too small for us? 

Husband: Yes and you keep coming back to ask the same question.

        Wife: Okay. Since you don’t often call either, please call the children, at least once a month. They go on for months without speaking with you. I noticed they don’t seem to care anymore.

Husband: Okay

         Wife: That is about all. 

 Husband: Silence (breathing sound)

        Wife: Have a beautiful day.

Husband: Silence (breathing sound)

         Wife: Bye

Husband: Silence (breathing sound)

        Wife: Hello

Husband: Silence (Goes off the Phone) 

         Wife: Okay

 

 

 

Facing the reality of a dead marriage, where a spouse spends many years of endless hope in anticipation for a change, enduring a relationship that is bereft of life. Believe it or not, this was somebody’s experience and is another person’s state of affair. 

 

There is so much in life to be enjoyed. Are you feeling depressed, lonely, bereaved, abused or unfulfilled? I offer counselling and coaching services if you would like to book a session with me. 

Check out my services.

Comments

K
Kas
Goodness!
M
Melekwe Christian
Hmmmmmm so touching
O
Olaolu
I'm sorry Pastor Anita that you or anybody had to go through this...I'm really sorry ma..God bless you and may he bring solace and comfort to many others going through these things.
E
Edidiong
The Stark reality many face, but are too encumbered to take their destiny in their own hands and redefine their own lives and live happily ever after. ... social media on the other hand can most times be a fake stage where actors and spectators gather to play out parts to a script in hopes of ridding themselves of their false selves, thereby numbing the hollow ache inside themselves. There nothing like living ones 'own truth'
W
Winnie
Sad really to think that's how so many marriages are today..
C
CB
Wow! So brave and courageous to post. It shows that marriage can be very desirable on the outside, but it takes two on the inside to build a vibrant relationship.
S
Shable
So true! What i will advice is; Find you inner peace. Be happy for your kids sake. It is well! God knows it all & wants what is best for everyone.
O
Owoh John
You obviously went through hell with the man who apparently doesn't practice what he preaches. A man who prefers the adulation of the world than the prickings of his conscience. Does he even have one? A man who obviously loves the pleasures and things of this world
I
Ifeanyi
Pastor Anita, I understand. No wonder God revealed to me in my dream to stop praying for the crached marriage to be rebuild and that he is the problem. I just pray that you will fulfill your own destiny well in this life. I love you.
A
Adetunji
This brought tears to my eyes. Its amazing how everybody else can think two people are happy and doing great things in their marriage. But we will never really know the truth of what goes on behind close doors
I
ima umanah
Honestly, if this actually happened in reality.
Then I must say it's cruelty at its peak
M
mercy
We have been sold a lie. Yes, we have been. I am talking about those in the West African Christian circles who want to get into this thing called marriage.

What is the lie? The lie that the most important thing to look out for in a spouse is how "ogyacious" he or she is. Yes, it wasn't enough that you were not unequally yoked with an unbeliever, you had to go further and settle with the most tongue talking, highest giving, pope-like looking brother or sister there was. Other attributes needed for the day-to-day living in marriage was not emphasized as much. After all, we were told that as long as the person was spirichuaaa, everything would be okay.
G
Gozie
This is beautiful Anita. I will like to have an appointment.
C
Clement
You could have gone to be with him. The Word of God says what God has joined together, let not man put asunder. He was putting asunder, you completed the putting asunder.
D
DERICK
Pastor Anita, you are starting a service? Wow!! *Grabs face* I miss reading your blog!!! Wow!!
A
Angeline
Powerful
D
Dora
May our lives not be lived in hypocrisy. God help us
I
Ifeoma Nnadozie
I feel you ma'am
R
Ronke
Hmmm so true. The bit about “it’s another person’s state of affair” but they can’t say it out really got me. This narrative about marriage needs to change and how can we ensure this doesn’t extend to the next generations. Hmmm deep thought. For everyone going through this, God please strengthen them for You alone can bring about suitable solution and total healing from hurts etc. This really brings tears to my eyes and hurts deeply.
P
Pastor Chima
We love you my Pastor for standing up to be counted and saying the truth which seems bereft in this generation of deceitful so called christians.
N
Noreen
Unfortunately the reality of most marriages today
V
Valerie Daubs
This is so sad but true. Alot of spouses are in unhappy marriages but keeping mute. Enduring when marriage in actual should be enjoyed. Welldone ma, for speaking out.
C
Chinenye
I love the mind whisper! Embracing change, accepting new opportunities! Great step in the right direction. I am motivated a 1000 times now. Well done Pastor Anita.
P
Priscilla
Thank you dear pastor Anita, i normally dont write komments. But your post 3 years ago titled "soul winning" took out my legs from muiry clay. I read that pist almost 50 times again ang again till that sink. Thank God for your courage and speaking the truth. think that peace should be always in the front since it may help others like me.
O
Olivia Vam
HOW DO WE BOOK A SESSION WITH YOU PASTOR ANITA?
E
Ed
Good day Pastor, this and much more is exactly my experience at the moment and I am lost at what to do. I will appreciate your advice, I can't say much here because I like to keep things private.
J
Joseph
I strongly feel, something went wrong, prior to this. Cause naturally, every man should want to crave been with his wife, even when travel afar off, he will crave coming back to his wife and family. In synopsis, there is a story behind this story.
H
Haye Lomani
Pastor Anita. sorry
I understand ur thought of filling but we're they follow of Jesus Christ. All the time we should biyer the challenges in life for the sake of Christ.
P
Pst Iyke
Wife: Their greetings are on social media, no contact by text or by email.

Dear Lord Jesus, this is the part of this article that pricks my heart like a sword. Having being there and seen the whole social media drama, to then know that there was actually no contact from these same people who profess love and say things like : "we do not have the ability to hate...." They Preach and shout "Stop this wickedness" every where.

What other wickedness can be compared to this. Father help me overcome the pain i feel in my spirit now. Pastor Anita thank God for giving you the grace and strength to move on and may the lord Jesus christ grant you more grace. This is too hard for me.
It feels like a film or movie for me to know that these men behaved this way, then acted like they really cared and jumping on the stage during those programs when you were called to the stage. This is very traumatizing for me. Please if you are or find yourself in the same situation, reach out for help immediately and don't keep quite.

U
Udie
Thank you for sharing with us lessons from your pain and comforting others with the same comfort you have received.
My word to make and female of all ages who are seeking to marry is: don't marry anyone who has no mentor and is above the law.
Everyone needs someone on earth (not God) who can say sit and you have to because of that voice. I am not referring to overriding the human will but this is how our society was when we lived in communities but now people are scattered around the world and due to their wealth and achievements have no such covering as a mentor so that when there is a problem in the relationship because he has no mentor and no one he or she listens to then you are done.
A
angela
Quite painful to read. I'm now more careful about who I follow.
E
Emmanuel
Omg this post is like a mirror I see myself Better now, OhGodMakeMeAGoodHusband
G
Gabriel Nosa Oghagbon
It is the same every where, people pretend , nobody want its dead marriage to be spoken about publicly. Pastor Oyahiklome case is a classical example ,until it was made public. As a Pastor it didn't help matter. We will recalled what advice's are given after wedding marriages, when couples are told not to allow third party into their marriage. Third parties are integral part of any good marriage, and therefore must not be left isolated. They have been there . weren't they the people that gave advises to the couple, when they were courting? Did they not give them money , when they were broke? How come after marriage, they are suddenly told not to allow third party into their marriages. If experienced couples were allowed into the Oyahiklomes marriages at the early stated, it wouldn't have collapsed, this is my take. I pray the marriage, comes back to life, because God do not support divorce.
K
Ken
85% of men of God are in the same state, they are living covering up, suffering and smiling. Anita did because she is oyibo
S
Saint Paul
This is so confusing that one start to imaging if its true ..But as far as one cannot coop the best bet is to go separate ways but most times before going seperste ways they need to try staying apart for a year or two even three to see if they can feel for each other to start all over again.
R
Rose
OMG! Really! There's no point to such a marriage if this actually happened to someone
RT
Rose
Dear Pastor Anita, you are indeed a hero, you are alive today because you choose to live, only God can say what would have happened to you if you had stayed in such a toxic relationship, I pray that other women in an abusive relationships will brave up this way, a divorce is better than a R. I. P caused by a toxic marriage.

I pray that Almighty God will keep using your story to help other women with such experience.

Thank you so much for not taking your own life as a result of all you went through, thank you once again for choosing to live, we know what you went through, I understand your pains and I know theres no book to contain your bitter experience in that marriage, but I also know that God is not asleep, in due time he will avenge for you , we are praying for your protection , Ma. stay blessed.
RT
Rose
@Clement, this your comment is the singular reason why women die in their marriages, I pray you keep this same advice for that your precious daughter, going through this same thing, you should be ashamed to use asunder scripture to cover up for evil, dont pray to bury any of your daughter's in marriage, who told you we don't know thou shall not put asunder? Would you have preferred she died there? Please if you dont have anything good to say about someone's experience just be mute okay???
Y
Your daughter for life
Wow wow wow,am full of tears.you are the best,and nothing in this life will take your place in my heart.
I want to tell you I love you,and will always do
R
Rachel
This is very touching. Thank for your courage in speaking the truth and standing up for the truth .Against all odds you prevailed. The beautiful thing is, you opened some many eyes,ears and hearts and the righteous judge will reward you on that glorious day.
Mattew 19:29 "And every one that hath forsaken houses, or brethren, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands, for my name's sake, shall receive an hundredfold, and shall inherit everlasting life."

I pray that God will continually heal you and everyone who has had this type of experience of the deep pain whenever it tries to show its ugly head again. May the peace and grace of the Lord Jesus be with you always Amen.
A
Ayorinde Margaret
Thanks for letting out.This is the focal point of marriage challenges and we Christian shy away from it.marriage is to be Enjoy not endures
J
Janewrites
This and many more like these are not considered major problems in an African Marriage. We are asked to suck it up get used to it. But I want to be happy. Everyone deserves to be happy. Yes I am depressed, I need help. Real help. I have suicidal thoughts, I need help.
B
Becca
Hmmm, Pastor I am so sorry you had to go through this. I feel ashamed that even when some of us knew that things were not how they should be, we lived in denial and lied to ourselves and others about it. We said things like "he comes very often to see his family" and all the other nonsense we (CEC members, Pastors, leaders) all used to blab. Shame on us! May continue to strengthen and restore all that was stolen from you.
R
Ronald
Pastor Anita, I would like to hear you preaching and being pastor of a church again...But i understand that matter is between you and the lord....I just miss your ministry!!
I
IK
This story is true. I began to see it for what it was when I noticed that the picture in the ROR Devotional and other publications/ promotional items were cropped & photoshopped.
TL
Temitope
This is intriguing. I went through same....
To God be the glory for his grace.To live is indeed a choice!
M
Michael Olofin
May God continually bless you. And he that started a good work in you shall finish it.
Many may call you names but you are God’s beloved. A man should also love his wife as Christ loved the church.
The lord will make everything beautiful in its time.
G
Ginika
What a very sad situation of a woman, who loved a man that never loved her, simply used. To be separated from your wife and kids for over seventeen years, and watch them suffer while living in luxury, hmmmmm. There was no sign of love, just appearances and photoshop. She worked very hard as my Pastor. May God keep yo strong and other women in her shoes.
O
Onlyson
Oh, God!!!
EM
Ellah
Thank you for sharing Pastor Anita.
I love you????
B
Black
I cant believe how disconnected the husband is ;threw me to tears when the wife says try and call the children at least once a month but the man doesnt even recognise that as a red flag ;woow I'm sure God Himself is disappointed at such marriages which are supposed to be the opposite and be an example of heavenly unity ;I cant wait for this book in the bookshop it will disappear from the shelves like nobody 's business pls publish it soon
A
Augusta
I can't understand why some of you seem so shocked that this happened between Pastor Chris & his ex-wife. Anyone who was in Christ Embassy knew that there was no connection between them. Their marriage was over decades ago. I just wish the Anita will come out fully and straight forwardly tell the world what exactly happened. Joyce Meyer openly disclosed what she experienced. Until then, you can't really heal and help others when you keep people guessing about what really happened or whether or not it really happened. We know that it was a painful ordeal, but you have to open up fully about it.
A
ABIA STANISLOUS ABIA
Thanks for sharing pastor ma.I always wondered.This has really helped.I wish you all the best in your new venture.You have been and will always be such a blessing to so many.God bless you.
A
Anoymous
Thank you for sharing , I had the same experience and still Recovering from the trauma
P
Phil
Powerful woman! You held out in pain for long. Putting up a brave front and smile, yet hurting terribly. How in the world can one country be too small for a couple? I never heard that before even in cartoons.
C
Chinyere
I just love you pastor Anita
R
Rebecca
My lovely Anita, you are doing such a great job! Very well done!!
N
Nini
This is so emotional. I don't want to ever experience this, Lord i don't.
lot of loves Pastor Anita
G
Gomolemo Pheeha
Oh goodness so touchy.
S
Salem King
After reading this through, I'm encouraged that the decision I made to never to judge anyone who has who has been a victim of divorce was indeed the right one. Though am a man, I've been there myself and I believe at some point, the wisest decision anyone can make in such a marriage is to let go!
L
Lea
Sad, sad, sad, situation. What is scary is that it is someone 's reality as we speak.
D
David
I feel like laughing......though sorry.....but how can you say "One country is too small" for a couple to dwell 2gether, I found that to be very funny.
G
Gloria
Distance, when not handled property can stifle the life and love in a marriage. I have experienced it first-hand. You grow apart as two strangers, rather than a couple, which literarily means to link things together. The key word there, is together. Truth be told, God never intended for it to be so. He said, it is not good for man to be alone, so he made for him, a companion. Anything outside this is an anomaly, this is why eventually, the cookies crumble.
T
Titi
I AM happy for you.
It really was a journey, a classical drama in this lifetime.
Thank you for living that reality with a small “r” for others to learn.
Thank you for starting all over, living a new reality of peace, Joy, happiness and fulfillment.
Thank you for expanding in your awareness of who and what you really are and also reaching out to others to help them not toll that path.
In all thank you for being you.
I AM Grateful
N
Nicole
Powerful. Thanks!
TA
Tonye
At the beginning of life, the human being takes orders, from parents, teachers, adults, peers, etc in our environment..
Later on in life, we progress to giving orders ourselves, to our children, younger members of our environment, etc and never sim to understand why we should take orders, at this time, from the younger ones, or why they find it difficult to comply with simple orders.
Only the smart recognize that we don't know it all and that learning never stops.
D
David Orji.
First and foremost, marriage is for companionship. It's not good to be alone. Who encourages each when affliction and discouragement arise? Marriage is for comfort and caring through out a life time.
B
blessingsaflow
I do pray for you everyday that a day will come in which the God of Justice and Righteousness will VINDICATE you
F
Fidel
This is unbelievable, more touching than a fictional story of many awards!
N
Ngozi
Terrible
And sad as all was painted rosy rosy
Saying one thing snd doing another thing

Not sure though where it’s in the Bible that husband and wife living in one country is too small

I think it’s a way of giving someone the opportunity to do whatever they want
ie eating their cake and having it
Meaning staying “married “ but playing away with mistresses
Awful
J
Judy
My husband is a pastor but spend most of his time with another woman only to come home daily at 1.00 or 1.30 am to bath and change clothes then leave again by 7.00 am. Am having hard time because he doesn't speak to me either and we are sharing the same bed without intimacy. Please advise me.